Part 4

Arnav guided Khushi to the entrance of Raizada Mansion. He glanced at his watch and waited. They still had time for them to make their grand entrance. Everything was going to plan. In fact better than planned, he smirked. Turning his head slightly, he studied Khushi. She looked nervous but content. Her eyes glint with happiness. Was this what she truly wanted or was it a way to play him to get Shyam? He tried to push the thought away but struggled. Images of her and Shyam in embrace flashed before him. 

What if this was just a scam? She said all the sweet things but didn’t Shyam do the same with his sister. Rani Sahiba this and Rani Sahiba that when he secretly lusted over Khushi. Khushi could be the same. He wanted to believe her, desperately wanted it but yet couldn’t.

He let go of her hand and closed his eyes for a brief moment. He should not be weak. Arnav Singh Raizada was fooled once by his own brother in law but not ever again. He would see to it and if that meant he would have to keep his emotions in check for Khushi, he would do so too. He was doing this only for his sister’s happiness. Khushi was now his wife but she was just a means to an end and nothing more or less. And the more he reminded himself of this the better. He stepped closer to Khushi and again grabbed her hand, more strongly this time.

She looked up to study him. Something had changed but she had no idea what. The warmth in his eyes were gone and now all she saw was herself reflected through stoned-cold pair of brown eyes. Something in her shuddered and it frightened her to the core. What was happening? Did she trust him too easily? Was her naivity going to bring her down again. But nothing stood out. The wedding was perfect. She held her breath. Too perfect. He was angry and then very sweet, and she did not think anything of it. Stupid girl! What did he say? If she ever doubted him again, it will be disastrous. And then she did not doubt him. She took all his actions after on face value. But there was nothing on face value in this whole evening. The reason why they were marrying was for Anjali’s happiness and he had threatened stopping Payal’s wedding to get what he wanted. Please Devi Mayaa, what is happening?

Khushi watched attentively as his smile returned as soon as the registrar appeared.

“Thank you for coming tonight. It means a lot to us.” Armav spoke sweetly.

“My pleasure Mr Raizada.” The registrar turned her attention to Khushi. “Congratulations Mrs Raizada. You are such a lucky woman. I’ve never seen a husband who went through so much trouble to organise a surprise wedding for his future wife and that too on Valentine’s Day. I’ve always read it in novels but today is the first time I have seen it. Truly you are one lucky woman and I’m sure there will be plenty of envious women and many heartbroken ones now that the most eligible bachelor is officially married.”

“Thank you.” Khushi forced a smile. Surprise wedding?! Is that what he said to get the registrar to come. Her chest tightened and she struggled to breath. That was all a show?! She refused to believe it. Yes, he had planned everything but surely there had to be more to it.

As soon as the registrar was out of sight, Mr Chatterjee, Mr Dhar and Aman approached them.

“How long do you give her before word spreads that I’ve been married?” Arnav asked his team.

“10 minutes, max. Should we place a gag order on the registrar. I’ve arranged for it and we can serve it.”

“No Mr Chatterjee, I want the news to leak. Aman have you got the pictures?”

Pictures? What pictures? Khushi thought. She did not see any photographers but then she was not looking. She was too engrossed with the whole wedding thingy. Which girl wouldnt be? Did Arnav take advantage of that?! Please no.

But surely she would have known if there were photos being taken. She edged closer to Arnav as Aman showed him the shots that were taken. Her smiling like a madly in love bride. Their passionate kiss. Him whispering to her about whether she was sure of the marriage. Her looking lovingly in his eyes. Their phere. Glancing at the sky together. Hand in hand with them smiling. His soft kiss on her forehead. Him laughing at her remarks.

Khushi felt faint and intense hot. She wanted to sit down. This definitely had to be a show. Anyone looking at the pictures would easily conclude that they were so in love. No one would ever guess that something more sinister was happening on the background. She had to give it to Arnav, he had planned to perfection and that’s why he was the successful Arnav singh Raizada and she was the dumb Khushi Kumari Gupta. Even after he had warned her in the car, she had no clue what she had walked into. She wanted to run away but she couldn’t. She wanted to cry but condition 5 would prevent that – she had to be the perfect wife. She was stuck, and in exactly the position he wanted her in.

“Aman, leak most of these photos to the press and the fact about the marriage. Once media is swarmed with the news, AR will be approached to confirm this news. Don’t say anything yet. Let it bubble and then tomorrow, do an official press release. I want everyone to know about this wedding. Regarding Payal and Akash’s wedding, do a press release with the top photos today.”

“What do you think Khushi? I have to say you were perfect up in the terrace. Even your vows were excellent. The registrar will remember it and she will definitely sell her story, anonymously of course. Shall we?” He raised his eyebrow and signalled towards the house. He also signalled that his team could leave now and they responded oblingingly.

Khushi took a small step away and steadied herself. “Was it all just a show?” she managed a whisper.

“What do you think Khushi? Did you think I organise this because I love you? I told you Khushi, don’t fall for me because I will not fall for you. And it will do you good if you don’t ever underestimate me on that.” His voice cold.

“Why did we get married Arnavji? You wanted Anjali’s happiness. You could control Shyam, fix him up some way. Why marriage? Particularly when you don’t believe in marriage?”

“You know the reason why Khushi.”

“Yes, you think I’m involved with Shyam and you think he will leave Anjali for me, even when I don’t want anything to do with it. But being the mighty Arnav singh Raizada, you could have me placed anyway – a land far faraway with several guards to monitor my freedom. You could have sent me to Timbuktu, but you chose not to. Why?”

“There’s a famous saying – you keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”

“Enemies?”

“Yes – enemies defined as an opponent, adversary, foe that lies, hurts and betrays.”

“I know what enemy is. And you regard me as your enemy. Why? Because I lied. I didn’t tell you about Shyam. I admit that. I’m sorry about it but I did not say anything for your sake and Anjaliji’s but you chose not to believe it. Or maybe believe is a strong word. You chose not to trust what I say.”

“It does not matter Khushi. Shall we go in.”

“Not yet. Am I the only one that has lied between us?”

Khushi stood there unsure what her next move would be. But something that Lavanya had said about Arnav not knowing his feelings and when she finds out, she needs to do so for both of them. To make him realise it.

“You say that you wont ever fall in love with me. Is that right?”

“You know what I said.”

“You lie.”

Arnav looked intensely at her and tried to grab her hand. “Khushi stop this. Let’s go.”

Khushi raised her hand upwards, palm facing him. “No. Not yet. Stop.” She took another step back to increase the distance between them. “I am right. You lie too. you lied in the past and you are still lying.”

Arnav crossed his arms around his chest. “Okay Khushi, we will play it your way. Only once and DONT push my patience. This is my wedding present to you. What do I lie about?”

“About your feelings for me. To think earlier in the car, I would be even slightly remotely happy if you loved me at least a little. And I was willing to do anything to get you to love me. But I was so wrong. How could I be so blind?! You said that you will never love me. How is that so Arnavji when you are already in love with me.”

“What nonsense.”

“Really? Nonsense?! You are just deluding yourself. I have proof.”

“What proof?”

“1. Why did you rescue me from the guesthouse? You should have left me there to die.

2. Why did you attack the goons in Nainital. You should have let them kidnap me, hurt me. Instead, you retaliated without any consequence to yourself.

3. When you rushed to my side in the hospital, after babuji’s ill health.

4. you paid the hospital bill.

5. you took the blame for the broken vase.

6. Diwali night when you approached me and nearly kissed me. And then, you ran as fast as you could to announce your engagement to Lavanya. Afraid of admitting that you were feeling something and may be falling in love?

7. The anger in your eyes when you found out I was engaged. You knew I was not happy about it. And then you wanted me to arrange your engagement to prove that it does not matter between us?

8. And then breaking of your engagement. Why did it break Arnavji?”

She stepped closer to him. “Why are you so afraid to admit you love someone? And over the last two weeks, you changed. Became kinder, sweeter, warmer. The kiss, the dare. The helping me to win by dancing with me even though you would lose the bet. You were starting to allow yourself to fall in love. To admit to yourself. More so when you thought you had lost me through an accident. And then buying the bangles. Helping me with the food. Those all matter. Your actions speak louder than words. You are in love with me.”

Khushi moved forward and for the first time, Arnav edged backwards.

“it does not matter anymore Khushi. You betrayed me. And that’s all that matters.”

“Another lie, Arnavji. It matters a lot. Betrayal is a strong word. And one only gets betrayed by someone, if they matter a lot to them. And I matter to you, a lot. In fact you don’t just love me.” She swallowed her tears as the reality finally hit her. “You love me a lot and that’s why what you saw between me and Shyam hurts immensely. And I'm so so sorry. I tell you nothing happened but you are not going to believe me because what you feared most when you do fall in love has happened. I’ve broken your trust and betrayed you.”

“So now you understand why I wont fall in love with you.”

“Rubbish!!! You are in too deep, just like I am. Who are we kidding?! We are mature adults. Well you are and I am learning fast. The least we can do is be honest with each other.”

Khushi moved closer. Her voice barely a whisper. “You still love me extremely like I do for you. That’s why you cant send me away. That's why I am willing to give up my family and any chance for happiness to be with you. That’s why we have had two wedding ceremonies to link us together. That’s why our contract will never allow for a divorce.”

Arnav took another step. His jaw clenched and Khushi could see his eyes becoming moist. She took another step forward. “I’ve broken your trust and hurt you really deeply and for that I’m sorry. But no matter what I say, you have already made up your mind to hate me. And your hatred and anger are just as intense as your love. How does one overcome that? I’ve lost even before the game begins.”

Lifting her hand and placing it gently on his crossed arms. “How do I deal with the hate? Normally one would use love and trust. You don’t trust me at all and wont show me what I can do to regain it. And love. Ironically, love is the thing that is spurring the hate. So everytime you love me or give in to the love, the hatred gets stronger. What can I do?” 

She now allowed herself to sob freely. “What have we created Arnavji??! Our love will not allow us to separate, yet your hatred will not allow us to be one either. What a mess!!! You are right. This is worse than hell but not just for me, for you too and for both of us. And it will be a perpetual cycle. Hell seems like a sanctuary compared to this.”

 

She allowed her hands to gently caress his arms as she spoke. “You, Arnav Singh Raizada, have always stressed that you chose your own destiny and now mine.  Why would you choose this mess? I have always left it to fate. Granted fate sometimes has not been kind to me and I have made bad decisions. I may have betrayed you by not telling you about Shyam when I should have. But I was motivated by love to prevent you from getting hurt and I thought he would change. I was naïve then but not anymore. What was your motivation in getting us into this? It cant be purely be Anjali's happiness.”

Khushi wiped the tears from her eyes and edged even closer where there was hardly anything separating them. “At least you can hate. Even after all you have done and soon the sacrifices I will continue to make for this decision where I’m sure my parents and family will disown me and I will be all alone in every sense of the word, I cannot hate you even if I tried.” 

She placed her right hand softly on his left cheek and fixed her eyes in his. “I love you with all my heart and soul and all I can do is love, cherish, honour and obey you." She placed a soft kiss on his cheeks and then whispered in his ear. "But that is not enough for you is it?”

She stepped back and wiped her eyes. She fiddled with her outfit. “I’m ready now.”